Alex and I have always wanted children. Alexa was born after 5 years of trying and Madilynn took about 2 years. I had just decided we needed to look into adoption when we found out we were pregnant. We were so excited to be expecting again!! My pregnancy was very normal, alot like my first. I did have gestational diabetes again but that was normal for me. At 32 weeks we went in for our 2nd Ultrasound, just a routine ultrasound because of the diabetes they wanted to make sure she wasn't getting too big. The tech talked about how big she was going to be (8 lbs+) at delivery but that was it. After leaving (it was a Friday) we didn't think anything else of it and went on our merry way! The following Monday My OB called to tell me there was a lot of extra fluid (common with Diabetes) but that wasn't going to be much of a concern. He then continued with "her large limbs are measuring 7 weeks smaller than her head and torso. This could be Achondroplasia or another form of dwarfism. We need to send you to Sacramento to have a level 2 ultrasound."............ WHAT!!?! We had always worried about down syndrome because of our age, but Dwarfism??!? I honestly felt like I was having an out of body experience.....this kind of thing didn't happen to people we knew, let alone us. This is my journal entry the day after getting the news.
"Yesterday Dr Ainsworth called and told us that Madilynn’s ultrasound was not normal. He said her limbs were 7 weeks smaller than her head and torso which means she is a dwarf. It was very shocking and upsetting news. I worried about the life she would lead, the kids in school, the hardships she would face. I worried she wouldn’t find an LDS LP to marry (although she could marry a regular size person). There were many tears as Alex and I researched what this means on the Internet. But after prayer and meditation, I have come to terms with this news. I am only worried now about how I as her mother will prepare her for her life and mostly the way others will treat her. I am grateful she doesn’t have something life threatening and it could be so much worse. We will still have the opportunity to raise our little girl, and make her feel whole and complete. She will be different, but she will know she can accomplish anything she wants. I feel blessed that we were chosen to raise her, and know she is a special spirit. I am still scared of our future, but know it will bring love and happiness."
That Friday we headed to Sacramento for another ultrasound (although we knew the results were going to be the same). I paid close attention to the pictures on the wall and could see more clearly the little hands and arms.....so obvious when you're looking for them. The tech left and the Dr. came in. She took over the ultrasound and spent alot of time on her heart and chest cavity. I was starting to get really worried there was something wrong with her heart or lungs. The Dr then said "so what do you know??" and I said "that her limbs are smaller and that she probably has dwarfism." She nodded and said "I believe she has achondroplasia". Now this is where it gets odd, for some reason I had no idea what achondroplasia meant. Although I had researched it, talked about it with my hubby and heard it from our OB my mind suddenly went blank. Achondroplasia is such a big word I thought instantly it was a life threatening condition, something to do with her heart. I was so scared we were going to loose our little girl shortly after birth and we wouldn't have her in our lives. I was SCARED!! After the Dr. left I turned to Alex and said "what is that? What does she have?" and he calmly looked at me and said "Achondroplasia, that's what we were expecting. The most common form of dwarfism". At that moment a calm washed over me. Everything was going to be fine, who cares if she is a little person, we get to raise her, we get to love her, we get to have her in our lives. From that point forward I haven't felt sorry for anything we are going through. I know Madilynn choose us to be her parents and Our Heavenly Father is entrusting us with a special spirit. I don't know why he has chosen us, but I am grateful for the responsibility. I just hope I can live up to the expectations.
Our little Madilynn is due in May 2011 (next month) and we can't wait to have her here. She is already loved so much!!!!
2 months ago
